Richard is mocking me for actually wanting this huge decanter for Q-Tips.

Clearly I would have a glass top to it. I’m not unsanitary. I’m a lady.

One of the many jobs I had while growing up was cleaning houses. For 2 years I would go to people’s houses and clean it from top to bottom. For a mere $10/hour I would vacuum, dust, do laundry, wash dishes, clean the bathroom…basically get your house back in shape. These were really nice houses in Hermosa Beach and the bathrooms were always larger than a typical studio apartment in SF. Gorgeous bathrooms. Double sinks with the perfect brushes metal fixtures. Matching plush towels with the initials stitched in them. AND every house had those perfect little glass containers that held the Q-Tips. In my house, we opened the generic box of cotton tips and let the dust settle in them throughout the year.

The glass container’s only purpose was to hold the Q-Tips upright and to shield them from any dust particles. In my house, you would never buy such an extravagant item.

To me, that container defined a certain level of posh.

So every morning now…. I stare at my little glass container that holds brand name Q-Tips and I think to myself goddamn. I am the shit.

So clearly if I had the super size Q-Tip decanter that would make me super awesome.